Virtues That Matter for 2018

From the archive. Originally published on migmol.com on 2018-01-01, recovered and republished here in 2026 at its original address. Unedited except for formatting.

Every new year for more than a decade, I’ve been making wish lists for the coming year. Being a “planner” (and over-thinker) wish lists have been a way for me to identify wild, audacious things I want to happen. If for anything, it seems to have been working because when I take a look at the lists from the previous years, a lot of them end up coming true. Perhaps declaring desires create a psychological impression that subconsciously steers a person into that direction. Alternately, it could just be the nature of progress that we attain more goals as time passes by.

There is nothing inherently bad about wish lists, but for 2018, I want to do things differently. Instead of just a wish list, I want to focus on virtues.

The mentality of minimalism suggests that we put less focus on material things because they won’t really make us happy. In economics, Engel’s Law observes that the more money you have, the more you actually spend. So yes, I can have material things as goals, but it would just be feeding the cycle. If for anything, I will be even more fixated on certain “luxuries” that I need in my life. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not claiming to be a master at minimalism but I appreciate the value it puts on the table.

The philosophy of modern stoicism talks about attaining virtue as a means to living a good life. Without going too much into it, virtues as goals makes sense because: a) anyone can practice it, regardless of their state in life or current material possessions, and b) as it is defined, anyone can do it as they are actions, thoughts, or emotions that are controlled by the individual.

So for this list of goals in 2018, the premise is simple: focus on the actions that add value to the world around you.

1. Kindness

If there was an advocacy that I want to push, it would be kindness. Kindness is different from charity because the recipient doesn’t necessarily need your help. They can live perfectly well without your acts. But the very basic concept of being kind is often overseen or forgotten.

How often do you see people forget to say “please” or “thank you” to waiters, guards, or people who are supposed to serve them? When was the last time you let someone cut in while you were driving? When was the last time you said hi to or smile at a stranger to acknowledge their presence? Can you resist the temptation to scold or judge someone who clearly doesn’t know what they’re doing?

These are very simple things that we teach to children but we sometimes forget in the stress of adult life.

2. Wisdom

The Serenity Prayer best describes this definition of wisdom: “Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Wisdom is the ability to accept things as they are & instead control the thoughts & emotions that come after. Quite basic stuff until paired with the next one.

3. Moderation

Something that I have been trying to practice towards the end of 2017 was the moderation of destructive desires & emotions (e.g. lust, infatuation, anger, disdain). Controlling these feelings means practicing ‘wisdom’.

In Buddhism, desire is the root of all suffering. That’s not a very popular thought because modern society has over-romanticized the concept of “desire”, but this idea is so powerful and has brought me so much joy in the past year. I want to practice it more.

4. Courage

In our modern lives, what are the things we fear that keep us from living the life we want?

In the company I work for, one of the leadership qualities we are assessed by is courage. When I was new, I found that a little silly, but as I found myself in positions to affect change, I found how important (and hard) courage actually is.

If you’ve ever seen the movie Coach Carter, you’d also be familiar with the popular scene about fear (originally a poem by Marianne Williamson): “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”

Tim Ferris had this really good TED Talk about ‘fear-setting’ in place of ‘goal setting’ which I think is pretty brilliant.

5. Adding Value

For me, the Parable of Talents is one of the most progressive bible stories. I honestly didn’t get it when I first heard it as a kid, but adding value to the world has since been a core belief of mine. My university’s mantra is lux-in-domino, be light to the world, and is one of the primary reasons I love my alma mater.

There’s this great stand up act by Jim Jeffries that talks about the progress of humanity. Rephrasing most of it, there are people who help drive progress and people who drag humanity behind. At the end of the day, before we die, we should have contributed to making the world a better place.

2017 has been a very interesting journey for me. This list is a departure from the usual, but I just wanted to share it. And hey, thanks for reading this far! Haha! Let’s have a great 2018, friends!